Is “balance” possible?
Or is it just a mythical beast that everyone keeps chasing after?
As we’ve been winding down the last few days of the summer session of In the Flow, one of the participants asked about how to find the balance between “getting too obsessive” with working on something and not being motivated to do it at all.
We all want that sweet spot in the middle, where we have focus and are getting things done….but not holding on so tightly that we start to burn out.
This was my answer:
1. Practice tuning into your body’s response to know when to stop.
If you’ve been focused on numbers (i.e. amount of time, etc.), when you get about halfway towards your number, stop & check in with your body. How do your shoulders feel? Are they relaxed or even energized? Or are they tensing up & rising towards your ears? How’s your neck? Are you in a head-forward posture? How’s your back? Do you feel supported? Is their pain or tension in it? How’s your stomach? The gut is a great place to check on SOOOO many things. If your body is telling you to stop, stop. Even if it’s for a little while & then you continue later. When we ignore our body’s signals about these things, we can start to head into adrenal exhaustion after a while (that tired but wired/unable to relax feeling).
2. Give yourself a short mantra or reminder phrase to loosen up.
One of mine if I find myself immersed in worry or trying to control an outcome about something is “get off the subject & do something that feels good.” When focusing on something directly keeps you in your head and in a overstimulated nervous system mode, it’s not the kind of quality focus we want. It’s almost like if you were wanting to focus on reading something, and it felt important, so you put it so close to your face that you couldn’t really read it. Taking a minute to recenter yourself, do something that physically feels good & re-focus in a balanced way helps SO much.
3. Give yourself permission to fail or to bail on it completely.
It’s amazing how this little mental shift can make a huge difference. I use this in tapping & manifestation work a lot too. Get clear on what you want, and then loosen your grip slightly. Just like with the negative hyperfocus, when our grip gets too tight, it’s easy for things to snap and get out of balance in one direction or the other. For me, sometimes it’s as simple as saying, “either way, I’m going to be okay.” That small, verbal reminder that your worth and wellbeing does not depend on any one choice or outcome is huge.
This is the kind of work we’ve been doing for the past 90 days in In the Flow. We’ve taken a simple process, and applied it in every area of life through practical integration strategies.
If you know you’ve been struggling to take that list of intentions in your journal and actually make them happen, or you start each new month planning to do things differently…only to get two weeks in and realize you’re still in the same rut, it’s not too late for this to be the year you create permanent changes. We start on September 6th, and registration is open now.